In sickness and in health

I don't think any of the weddings I've been to recently have included these words from the traditional wedding vows. For my Fiance and I, whether or not we end up choosing to have them included in the actual ceremony, they have special meaning. After Mrs. Lemon's post on wedding bee, it gave me courage to write about how medical issues have effected my relationship and wedding planning.

While neither of us have issues which require 24/7 special medical attention or that make us not be able to have a"normal" life; we both have medical conditions that we've dealt with our whole lives, and will effect our relationship through out our years together.

In fact I think our understanding of each other's medical issues and shared experiences of many Dr. visits and scary medical tests when we were young is one of the things that helped us bond.

My fiance has epilepsy. (it is actually much misunderstood disorder, and epilepsy foundation has a lot of info if you have time, click the link and take a gander!) He has dealt with it since he was very young. His is very well controlled with daily medication, and I don't expect any problems. However unlike a seating chart, signature drink, or first dance, all the planning in the world can not guarantee a seizure free wedding day. It's something you have to take as it comes.

I have a genetic condition effecting one in 2,000 women. While my medical issue does not effect me, or my fiancee as much on a day to day basis as his epilepsy, it certainly will effect our marriage. It (pretty much 100%) will make it necessary for us to get A LOT of medical help to bring any little ones into the world, and requires me to visit a Dr. a bit more often than most.

We both have known about each others' medical struggles since the first few months of our relationship. It was hard in the beginning to figure out how and when to tell him about it, especially since it's not something that I share with many people. He has always been supportive and caring, and I try to be the same way.

It's not always easy. Even though I know he's not really in immediate danger from a seizure, they are scary, and I do worry about him. We just don't let it get in our way. We do what we have to do to deal with it (Hello Ambulance bill we received since he's in a waiting period for insurance at a new job!), and move on.

We have discussed having donations to the foundations for our conditions as favors at our wedding. I know this is a hot button issue, so we'll see if it works out !


Has anyone else had to deal with either a medical issue of their partner, or worry about how and when to explain theirs to their partner. Did you work it into your wedding day at all ?